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Jason

Twins

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Jordan, Sutton, Twins by

I love having twins.  I really do.  Even when they were not yet sleeping through the night (I was blessed with a very involved husband even at 3 am feedings) or during the time of bottles and spit-up, I have always loved having twins.

Growing up with an older brother I knew I wanted more than one child.  Now, seeing my TWO together brings so much joy to my heart!  When I lost my mom at 18 I was so thankful to have my brother, Uncle Jordan.  He is truly someone I can talk about anything with and the ONE person who remembers our mother like I do.  I pray nothing happens to my husband or I at an early age but if it were to happen I’m so thankful our boys have each other.

Watching them together is so fun!  They play and giggle and hug and kiss and dance together.  Yes, there are spats here and there but for the most part it’s love and fun.

It’s also kind of weird to never know what it is like to only have ONE child.  When people often ask us, “How do you do it?!”  We always reply, “We dont’ know anything ELSE!”  It’s weird but also kind of refreshing.  Never knowing what it’s like to only have one, I’ve always been aware of my attention being spread equally and making sure each boy knows how much I love him.  There are times when one will wake from a nap early and I sneak in to get him out of his crib for some one-on-one time before his brother wakes up.  But for the most part I am reminding myself DAILY to always treat them equally and acknowledge each as an individual for they are SO different!

It’s also fun having twins because you instantly bond with anyone who has multiples.  It is kind of like a secret code.  I’ve made so many new friends just by having twins….on Facebook, in the blog world and in real life.  And anytime anyone comes to me with questions about having twins I get so excited because I can pass on all the knowledge and wisdom that I was so lucky to receive.

Love my twins.

Until next post…..they will be 18 months tomorrow!!!

The Mamarazzi

July 19, 2011
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Spoons!

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Mealtime, Sutton by

I have been putting off teaching the boys to eat with a spoon.  The only things they eat with a spoon are oatmeal and yogurt, both of which are super messy.  If you know me, you know I am a neat freak.  Yes, I admit it Jason.  He likes to point out that I am a neat freak, which he is not.  Today in the car he heard Fynn say, “dirty.”  Jason said he wasn’t surprised he learned that word from me.

The morning time is not my favorite time to have to clean up a big mess so I have avoided handing over the spoon.  Forks they understand and will use but spoons are an entirely new thing.  Well, this morning it was oatmeal for breakfast and Jason was feeding them with me so we handed the spoons over.  I have to say Fynn got it down fast and was great!  Sutton wanted to chew on the spoon the entire time because the poor kid is teething.  He did get some good bites in all on his own.  No big mess but we also kept an eye on their bowls so they couldn’t go crazy.  I will attempt this again!

He likes big bites!!

Sutton

He is so proud!

Until next post…

The Mamarazzi

July 17, 2011
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Not Where I Thought I’d Be But…

Posted in Infertility, Jason by

June 29, 2009 Ultrasound

I meet people all the time who say, “I want twins!”  I used to find it so odd to hear because growing up I never ONCE even thought about twins.  I didn’t know much about twins or multiples so it never was a topic of conversation.  When I was younger I envisioned myself growing up, graduating college, getting married and having A BABY.  It’s funny what we THINK we will do and what God brings us.

I met Jason my first semester at college in 1999.  We moved in together within 6 months (drastic I know…our families weren’t too thrilled) and when school let out for summer in 2002 Jason proposed.  Obviously I said yes and that following year, one month after I graduated college we got hitched.  Now, prior to the wedding we always knew we wanted to have kids we just didn’t set in stone WHEN.

Well, we got home from our honeymoon and BABY FEVER set in.  I now warn all my girlfriends of this intense, sudden feeling as soon as the wedding festivities pass because I was NOT prepared.  It’s funny because I hear girlfriends admit this feeling too.  I think we, as women, are sometimes programmed “first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage” so once the wedding is over, onto the next step.  Seems logical, right?

Jason had just started his undergrad work to eventually head to chiropractic college so it wasn’t the most appealing time for us.  But, it happened and neither one of us thought it would.  We REALLY weren’t trying.  So for our first anniversary we got to FREAK OUT that we were pregnant.  I will never forget the words popping up on the digital pregnancy test “PREGNANT!”  Okay, it didn’t have an exclamation point but it felt like it did.  Up until this very moment I WANTED a baby but never once had I sat down and REALLY thought about what it meant to have a baby.  But once the shock wore off we were excited.  We knew we would just figure it out.

We announced the news to our family on Father’s Day a week later and everyone was thrilled for us.  Fast forward to July 10 (yes I remember the day) I started having complications and we had lost the baby.  TALK ABOUT A BLOW!!  I took it extremely hard and found it to be a HUGE wake up call that I was not as ready as I thought.  Baby talk was put on hold.

Two years later, once we had moved to Kansas City and started getting settled the baby topic came up.  We had been to church that Sunday evening and the message was about finding your passion in life.  After that evening service Jason and I went to Village Inn and started discussing the subject.  I knew Jason was meant to be a chiropractor.  I had yet to meet anyone as passionate as he was about chiropractic and how much he genuinely wanted to HELP people….besides his father that is.  In our discussion I explained that the only thing I ever felt a calling to do was to be a mother.  Yes, I had attended college and received a degree in Advertising & Sales but that wasn’t what I was PASSIONATE about, just something that sounded interested at 18 years old.

The original plan was to wait until Jason was done with school to start a family but that September evening in 2006 after our visit to church and the ever-romantic and enlightening Village Inn, we started trying to have a baby.  Jason explained to me that it wasn’t fair for me to have to wait all those years to get to be a mother when I had supported his every decision toward becoming a chiropractor.

One month passed, two then three and finally six.  The worry set in.  The first pregnancy happened so easily and wasn’t even planned.  WHY was it taking so long?  I started researching online for tips and tricks and all the fun things we can laugh about now (anyone reading this that has tried to conceive will be laughing as well), now that we have BABIES.  I came across a message board full of women who were in my situation.  I started checking in a few times a day and we all became pretty close friends.  It’s amazing to see women support one another and encourage one another, even when they are struggling themselves.  And to this day, 4 1/2 years later I still talk to a majority of those women!

Nothing was working.  We tried supplements, acupuncture and a lot of other things I won’t share with the world.  But every month was a disappointment.  Finally we came upon a year of trying.  My doctor suggested a Reproductive Endocrinologist so to him we went for answers.  We got our answers.  We were told we had a better chance of getting pregnant by going to dinner and a movie than going to the bedroom.  Talk about painful news.  The procedure he recommended was In-Vitro Fertilization.  The costs were OUTRAGEOUS and the process was intimidating.  We attempted IUI just to SEE if it would work.  No luck.  We decided to hold off and try more of the same.  That was September of 2007.

Skip through months of sadness, disappointment, frustration, tears, anger and so on.  We were trying to save and figure out how to pay for this procedure once we decided to actually do it.  We were approached by my stepfather in April 2008.  He said he would donate a very nice donation to the “Blair and Jason Want a Baby” project.  Bring on the water-works!  After that evening we realized we should seriously consider WHEN we would want to attempt this invasive procedure now that it was more realistic…..we decided we would address it after the first of the year.  Then 2009 came and I said, “Let’s do it!”  With more contributions from family and our savings we were finally ready.

So we thought.

At the end of January 2009 we went in for the consult with our RE who went over every.single.detail.  We got started.  Not to bore you with the medical details…basically when the time came for the stim shots to start my body was not responding.  I was taking one shop a day.  This continued until April.  Yes, until April.  ONE SHOT EVERY SINGLE DAY!  Finally in April we took a break and were planned to start fresh with all new meds in May.  My body had a horrible time trying to respond positively to the meds but once it did the timing could not have been more PERFECT.

May 13, 2009 I got the news my grandfather had passed.  It was right after Mother’s Day, which is already a very difficult holiday for me….I was missing my mom and working so hard to try and become a mom.  I went in to get my blood work at the RE’s office before we headed home for the funeral.  The nurses and entire staff there knew us pretty well by that point and they were really cheering us on!  In the car on the way to my grandfather’s house I got the email….EVERYTHING WAS PERFECT!  I finally could start the stim shots.

From that point on it was a blur.  I was doing 2-3 shots a day for about 11 days I think.  We went in for the egg retrieval on May 27 and when I came out they informed us we had 15 eggs!  WOO HOO!  If you know IVF terms you know that is great.  We then got the embryo report the next day.  We had 13 viable, healthy embryos.  We transferred two and of course now you know two stuck.  We even have 8 still frozen for future use if we choose to do so.

I write this post because I have met SO MANY women who were in my shoes.  Women who have experienced miscarriage and/or fertility struggles.  I decided from day one of this struggle to be an open book.  I want women out there to know what we went through so if they ever need anything they know who to ask because I was fortunate to have women like that in my life.

Did I ever think this was HOW I would get pregnant?  NO

Did I ever think I would have TWINS?  NEVER

Would I change anything about the entire experience?  HECK NO!!!

God’s timing was so perfect in all of it.  I thank Him for the struggle, I truly do.  I appreciate my children more and more because I remember those days when I would just sit on the bathroom floor crying and wondering WHY this was happening.  I thank Him for surprising us with twins because that in itself is an experience I would never trade with another

Until next post….

The Mamarazzi

July 15, 2011
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Backyard Fun

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Outside, Playtime, Sutton by

BoysIt is middle of July here and the temperatures will not go below 100 degrees!  It’s miserably HOT!  The boys cannot be outside for longer than 5 minutes without their cheeks turning maroon.

I haven’t been taking them out back during the week because it is so hot but last night after dinner the backyard was mostly shaded so we let them out to play and even get a little wet!

Fynn

Fynn cannot stand the grass on his hands!

SuttonThis is Sutton’s way of saying, “I’m ready to play in the water!”

Now we’re talking…

Nights like these are my favorite!  I love watching my boys enjoy the simple fun of water coming out of a hose….and the giggles are contagious!

Until next post…..HINT Mohawks are coming tomorrow…

The Mamarazzi

July 12, 2011
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Grandma….Great Grandma That Is

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Sutton by

Grandma….Jason’s Grandma is also Grandma to our boys.  Technically she is Great Grandma but everyone calls her Grandma.  Great is an understatement when referring to this woman.

Grandma

Grandma came to stay with us once Kiki had to go home and we were so thankful for her two weeks with us.  Grandma was a cooking, cleaning, laundry, bottle washing, sanitizing, baby loving MACHINE!  We were so spoiled!  Grandma is always there when you need her and she and Grandpa even supply our boys with fresh, whole milk every week.  She made the boys’ crib bedding, their “first Thanksgiving” bibs, their “first Christmas” ornaments and she is always surprising them with fun toys and books.  For their first Easter she and Grandpa sent the boys books with their voices recorded as if they were reading to them.  They still have them in their bedroom.

Grandpa

Just as recently as a couple of weeks ago, Grandma came to stay with us and help watch the boys so I could work in the clinic more.  She showed up with the boys’ favorite toys – BALOONS AND BUBBLES!  She even introduced them to sidewalk chalk, which they love more each time they use it.  And in usual fashion she was such a wonderful cook and took wonderful care of all of us.

I only got to meet my grandmothers and one grandfather but never did I get to meet my GREAT grandparents.  My boys are so lucky that they will get to grow up knowing and loving their GREAT grandma and grandpa.

She has taught them how to wink and quack like a duck.  When I talk about being PRESENT….they are.

We love you GREAT Grandma and Grandpa!

Until next post…

The Mamarazzi

July 8, 2011
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Our Kiki

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Kiki, Sutton by

Mother's Day 2011

What would we do without our Kiki?!!!  Jason’s mom is “kiki” to our boys and cannot be called “grandma” because she looks way too young for that name.  She has been there since Day One.  Literally.  She drove up the SECOND she got the call the boys were coming that she didn’t even wait for Jason’s dad, she just hit the road.  She stayed with us for 3 weeks and I cried ALL.DAY.LONG when she had to leave.  She went to all the doctor’s appointments with me since Jason was still finishing up chiropractic school.  All the nurses thought she was my sister, not the Kiki.

Kiki

She was a LIFE SAVER!  I honestly can say we would have gone crazy without her.  Not having my own mother around I knew so little and was so scared of even the simplist thing.  She gave them their first bath at home, she would suck the HUGE boogies out of Fynn’s nose, she would make sure we ate and slept and when Jason got sick she camped out in the living room and did all the feedings with me.  She would calm my nerves when we had to take Sutton in for his heart murmur and hip dysplasia.  When I would just cry for no reason other than pure exhaustion she would calmly tell me that everything would be okay.  When I was so sad about Sutton’s inability to latch and nurse she reassured me he would be just find drinking from a bottle.  Kiki made everything feel like it would all be okay.  And it was.

First Bath

I was utterly exhausted and trying to heal from a c-section and Kiki saved me!  As soon as the boys finished their first bottles she would take them in the living room and tell me to go back to sleep.  It was the best gift anyone could offer at that moment.  I would get up and come into the living room and she would be covered in babies.  When it was getting closer to her leaving I was terrified to be alone with the twins and handle feedings, etc. on my own.  Fynn was nursing but Sutton had to have a bottle because of his latching problems so doing a simultaneous feeding was daunting.  Kiki went to Target and gave me the opportunity to do a “trial run” and when she walked in I had Fynn latched nursing with a bottle in Sutton’s mouth.  I had never felt so accomplished in my entire life.  Those few weeks were so amazing and I will always look back and be thankful for the bonding we got to experience.  A new mom without her mom is a horribly sad situation.  My mom’s death REALLY hit home once the boys were born.  It continues to get harder at times with each new day realizing everything my mom is missing.  She would have truly enjoyed being around my babies!

Kiki

I’m just so thankful my kids have ONE amazing Kiki.  Grandmas are special to all children and I remember both mine fondly.  I remember our rituals and loving moments.  I am so happy my boys will grow up with such an involved Kiki.

KikiKiki

The boys get to spend every Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon with their Kiki so I can go work with Jason at the clinic.  We live 2 miles from Jason’s parents so we are together often.  Pappy, Jason’s dad, and Kiki have been so involved with babysitting and spending time with our kids, sometimes they go running for them instead of Mommy and Daddy.

Kiki & Pappy

It is so important for kids to have parents AND grandparents who are not just involved but who are PRESENT.  I’ve learned so much growing up that it isn’t about the gifts or the trips or any of the material things….I remember the moments when I looked up and saw my family PRESENT in what was going on around us.  They were PRESENT in the moment of putting together my Barbie house or rocking in a chair or reading a book…..that was what mattered.  The eye contact.  The embraces.  Showing up when it counts.  The physical act of showing someone you are PRESENT and you LOVE them.  I want my children to be surrounded with that type of love every single day.

Kiki

We Love You Kiki!

July 7, 2011
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Bathroom

Posted in House, Jason by

We built our house and moved in March 17 of this year.  I had forgotten how much goes into moving into a new home…..you need blinds, curtains and decorative accents.  This will be a slow process since my double-wide stroller won’t allow me to shop in many stores.

However, I did find some awesome artwork pieces at a store in the mall and they were 50% off!

Jesse over at Good Girl Gone Glad came over to help me figure out where these should go….the winner was our bathroom.  That meet-up was a while back and last night we finally got around to hanging them.  I LOVE THEM!

Bathroom WallJason

Jason

 

Finished

July 6, 2011
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Mealtime

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Mealtime, Sutton by

Mealtime at our house can be very messy.  Jason and I have learned to accept this.

The boys usually play or cuddle up with Daddy while I fix dinner.  I love that our kitchen is open to the living room so I don’t feel so left out.  Every few minutes one of the boys might check to see if I need help.  🙂

Cuddle TimeSutton Chewing His Book

 

Tonight the boys had some yummy organic baked ziti with broccoli and rice focaccia bread with an apple crisp for dessert.  I think they liked it.

 

SuttonSutton

 

Fynn

Fynn

 

They do understand the concept of a fork but once you put the food into bowls they just want to pick the bowl up and play with it.  So we just plop the food in front of them and let them go to town.

Until next post….

The Mamarazzi

July 6, 2011
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Lake House

Posted in Fynn, Jason, Lake House, Sutton by

Today was the boys’ first trip to the lake house.  Jason and I used to go every summer with friends and family but my last time there was two years ago and I was pregnant and exhausted so I didn’t enjoy the full effect of being at the lake.

Fynn and Sutton had a lot of fun.  I am positive they will look back at their childhood and have plenty of fond memories at the lake house.

We laid in the hammock…

Lake HouseLake House

 

We played inside….had to take breaks so the boys’ cheeks could return to a normal hue instead of BEET red from the heat and humidity.

FynnSuttonLake House

We went down to the shore and Daddy showed the boys how to throw rocks in the water.  That was a HIT!  They did not want to leave.  As we were walking away they kept picking up rocks to throw.

I think there is something in the genetic make up of all males that makes rocks attractive to play with.

Boys will be Boys.

Lake HouseLake HouseLake HouseLake HouseLake House

We played in the yard….plenty of space to run free!

Lake houseLake HouseWatching Daddy coming up from the dock.  Dad got to clean the boat!  🙂  So much fun I’m sure.

Lake House

We even played in the game room and watched all the boaters from the window.

Lake HouseLake House

Yes I ended up taking more pictures of Fynn this time around because his brother was a good boy and slept an hour longer.

After grilling out for dinner we came home and as we pulled in our driveway we got to show the boys their first fireworks from our front yard.

Until next post….

The Mamarazzi

July 4, 2011
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My Family Part I

Posted in Jason by

First post…I’ve been trying to decide what I want to write about in my first post on my new beautiful blog. First, I must thank Jesse @ www.goodgirlgoneglad.com for doing my custom design. She created this page and made my goal and vision into reality. She rocks!!

This is my world – wife to an amazing man that practices chiropractic, he’s an incredible husband, best friend and father to our boys. Mom to twin boys born January 2010. After struggling to conceive for over 3 years, our two little miracles joined our adventures in life and not only made it more fun but showed us a whole new level of love one cannot describe with words. I try to capture as much of that joy and love with a camera. I have always been the girl with the camera. In college I was always taking photos and now that I have children I can’t help myself. It’s almost an addiction. I can easily take 200+ photos in one day. I just hope to capture every moment I can with the click of my camera.

Meet my family.

Hubby & I Jason – love of my life, great Christian man, fantastic chiropractor, involved and loving father and overall the one I have the most fun with. We married young and fall more in love with each new day. He is not one to talk negatively about people and does not gossip. He is talented in so many areas. He can fix anything, whether it is an issue in the house or your car he will take care of it. He can build pretty much anything he wants, an engine to a car, a deck, a fence, a dining room table…you name it.  He is a man of integrity and has the kindest soul I’ve ever known.  I’m so thankful he approached me on that front porch at a college party in October 1999 and told me I was beautiful.  That was the day our adventure began as two young kids in love who have now grown into a beautiful family.  There have been bumps in the road at times yet he has taught me what true, unconditional love means and has shown me encouragement, support and affection when I needed it most.  Thank you God for bringing Jason into my life.  I’m the luckiest girl to get to spend my life with him and our kids will grow into amazing young men because of their father.

Until next post….

The Mamarazzi

July 1, 2011
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